Summoneyy

Don Carlos in Gadgetzan still had his unusual hat. Once, he had defended it from every hot-blooded challenger who wanted it. Now his younger self was waiting in Old Hillsbrad.

I took the job.

The Caverns of Time had errands first. Andormu sent me along the timeway, and I found myself seven years behind with Thrall's escape keeping the whole world from coming apart. Small stakes.

Erozion gave us incendiaries and told us about Taretha's diversion for Thrall. The Infinite had taken her. We would make the diversion happen again.

At Durnholde Keep, I danced with someone before the fighting started. Then I pointed us at the work.

“Pick up the bomb and talk to dragon.”

Corruption and Immolate went onto the sentries. Rain of Fire caught a rifleman and sentry together. I called Haaroon, made a soulstone and healthstones, and put everything I had on Lieutenant Drake. He stayed down. The lodges burned.

“{rt1} Questie: Internment Lodges Set Ablaze: 1/1 for Taretha's Diversion!”

I handed the work to young Thrall and realized I had not started whatever came next.

“Damn I missed it.”

So we kept moving. Rain of Fire covered a mage, a warden, and veterans, and Captain Skarloc went down in the mess.

At Tarren Mill, there was loot talk and somebody who did not speak English. I tried, “Hablas ingles domino?” Then I explained in Spanish that he would not need on the next item unless he thought he needed it. There was also an axe better than his level 60 epic. Important business, in the middle of saving history.

Epoch Hunter fell too. “Thanks everyone.” I repaired my things and left with, “Adios! Buen suerte.”

Back in Nagrand, I passed through Halaa and Sunspring to the Mag'hari Procession. Saurfang the Younger heard what had become of the missing war party. Elder Yorley heard about the procession.

Two old worries put down.

Saurfang wanted vengeance at Sunspring. Yorley wanted Warmaul broken for what it had done. I understood both jobs.

Warmaul Hill was harder work. Haaroon and I found warlocks, brutes, and prisoners in cages. I kept giving him my health when he needed it. A Mountain Gronn gave up an eyeball on the way, which was useful, though not pleasant.

One Warmaul Warlock got me. I came back. Haaroon was still there, and so was the work.

We finished it: the last warlocks and brutes fell, and every Mag'har prisoner got free. The elders rewarded me with Manacles of Remembrance. Loot with a story is nicer.

Then Yorley sent me after an ogre king named Cho'war. He has a head. I have time.

I had the last things Nitrin the Learned needed: a flawless Greater Windroc beak, a gronn's eyeball, and blubber from an Aged Clefthoof. He could make his tincture, and he sent me after Levixus the Soul Caller and the Book of the Dead.

That sounds like a proper problem. Later.

Before I left, I found Kilrath on the Terokkar border and settled Jorin Deadeye's errand. Kilrath has a plan involving Boulderfist Invaders and beating Unkor the Ruthless until he talks.

Another sensible use of force.

Then I had to go. “gtg sorry. GL”

The hat is still waiting in the past. Cho'war is still in his cave. Haaroon and I have plenty left.

Garadar had work piled high. Missing mourners. Missing younglings. Ogres. Wanted criminals. Hunters with hunting to be done. I took what looked worth taking and went to see the country for myself.

At the Abandoned Armory, Nitrin the Learned had grim news about Levixus and the dead around Auchindoun. He needed ingredients for a tincture. I brought out Haaroon, put on my armor, and kept moving.

At the safari, Fitz had windrocs for me. Harold had talbuk. Hemet had clefthoof. Nagrand does not lack for things that need killing.

Skysong Lake gave me a howling wind, one angry lake spirit, and wet boots. I took the wind to the Throne of the Elements, where Morgh and the others explained that the spirits of Nagrand were being pushed until they could not settle.

Lo'ap wanted beans from dung heaps. He also wanted lake spirits dealt with. Gordawg wanted tortured earth put to sleep. Everyone had something wrong with the land. I had Haaroon, curses, and time.

At the Ring of Blood, I asked, “whats up.” Then I was in Zangarmarsh for experience.

The Slave Pens had plenty. I soulstoned someone, ate every strange sweet I had, and let Rain of Fire fall where it would do the most good. Six at once. Then ten. Haaroon and I found a rhythm: fire, curses, tap, fire.

“good stuff.”

There was time to cheer, dance with a Wastewalker Worker, and congratulate people. I told the group, “i might be down for another after.” When the next pull looked crowded, I said, “lets try.”

The Pens became messy. Rokmar the Crackler and Quagmirran went down. I brought Aelthea out for a while, and somebody cried on my shoulder afterward.

One Rain of Fire caught another player instead of only the Coilfang lot. I said, “im so sorry.”

Before that, I had said, “just a little unlucky there.” I still stood by it. A little unlucky can be very loud.

We went in again. I could not stay for another after all. “i wish i could go again but i gtg after this,” I told them. Mennu the Betrayer went down, and I got “good stuff though got like 2/3rd a level in xp” out before I left. In Shattrath, I said, “Ty! good luck everyone.”

Back in Nagrand, Lo'ap took the caracoli beans and gave me a Nagrand Cherry. I finished the twelve lake spirits too. The Pens had left me a shield, a shiv, and a pearl among the clutter; Matron Tikkit was happy to take most of it.

Then Lo'ap gave me living fire for the huts at Windyreed Village. The Eastern Hut went first. Then the Southern Hut. The Western Hut and the Large Hut followed.

Windyreed Wretches killed me twice during the job. A little unlucky. Every hut still burned, and Lo'ap had another spirit problem waiting afterward.

The Laughing Skull Ruins were less delicate. I chased warbeads and Warmaul around Zorbo the Advisor’s territory until the shaman and reaver work was done. Zorbo himself remains for another day.

The ruins got their turns too. A Warmaul Reaver, a Scorching Totem, and a Warmaul Shaman each put me down once. Haaroon stayed with me through it.

Warden Bullrok took the warbeads in Garadar. I reached level 66 there. It felt better than paying Osrok’s repair bill.

I ended in the Cleft of Shadow. Kurgul had new pages for the small demons: Firebolt, Blood Pact, and Fire Shield. I bought them all. I learned Incinerate and Searing Pain too.

Haaroon had worked hard. Gelqua had new pages to study. Arthas is still far away.

Nagrand was only a little unlucky.

I left Shattrath and paid 30s 60c to get to Spinebreaker Post. Revenge has travel expenses.

I put on Demon Armor, called the Dreadsteed, and rode for Zeth'Gor.

The first Bleeding Hollow Grunt received Curse of Agony, Corruption, and Immolate. Two Shadow Bolts made the point more firmly.

When it was over, I drew out what soul I could, made Soul Shards, and turned out two Major Healthstones. Useful little comforts.

Then I called Haaroon, my Felguard, and kept moving. A Bleeding Hollow Tormentor gave back some life through Drain Life. A Bleeding Hollow Riding Worg did not improve the evening.

The Skeletons and Necrolytes needed the wand. Haaroon needed a Health Funnel, so I gave him one. He has his own expenses.

I sent one more Grunt away in fear. Zeth'Gor gave up a little coin for the trouble.

Not Arthas. Still, shadow and fire are patient teachers. He will learn.

Khadgar had his servant show me Shattrath. I gasped at it. It seemed polite.

I waved to Zahlia in Lower City, then went back to hand in City of Light and Allegiance to the Scryers. Khadgar pointed me toward Voren'thal the Seer. I greeted the group too.

“hi.”

The Underbog was less welcoming. I summoned Haaroon, put on Fel Armor, and made a Major Soulstone and Major Healthstone before the underbats came in.

Rain of Fire caught three at once, then four. Another adventurer needed a Soulstone Resurrection, so I gave it. Haaroon and I kept moving.

Hungarfen took the Shadow Bolts and fell.

“grats!”

I found Ranger Armguards of the Bandit and Vindicator Gloves of Frozen Wrath. The gloves stayed with me. Ghaz'an went down after that, and I cheered for another adventurer. The armguards did not make it home.

We found Windcaller Claw while looking into the missing friends. I asked the group, “Where is Earthbinder Rayge?”

An Underbog Lord gave us trouble first. Then came The Black Stalker. I said, “ohh i missed him.” The next Shadow Bolts found him often enough.

The Stalker fell. “Thanks!!”

At last, there was my answer: Earthbinder Rayge.

I took the news to Watcher Jhang and received a Cenarion Ring of Casting. Back in Shattrath, I reported to Voren'thal in the Seer's Library.

At Arodis Sunblade's counter, I sold the armguards and the rest of the unwanted haul, paid 1g 40s 77c for repairs, and still earned 9g 64c.

The Underbog answered my question eventually. It had its own idea of a short answer.

I came into Shattrath and found Haris Pilton there. I gave him a wave. A small start, but a warm one.

In Lower City, I called my Dreadsteed.

“I miss my old sexy pants...”

Silmyr Lake was new to me. A Dampscale Basilisk was there to welcome me, so I gave it Agony, Corruption, and fire. Fear unsettled it. Shadow Bolt and Drain Soul finished the work.

One basilisk. One Soul Shard. Loot is loot.

Back in Shattrath, the Haggard War Veteran sent me to A'dal, leader of the Sha'tar—the ones who drove the demons from the city. I went down to Lower City, completed the errand, and bowed before A'dal.

Some people earn a bow.

Then I made a rude gesture at Khadgar in Lower City.

Some people earn the other gesture.

I paid 7s 47c to leave Orgrimmar and flew to Valormok. There I called my Dreadsteed, and we crossed Azshara together: the Ruins of Eldarath, Bear's Head, Timbermaw Hold, Ursolan, and the Legash Encampment.

I kept us moving until we found the Thalassian Base Camp.

At the Thalassian Base Camp, I reached level 63.

Quietly done. Still done.

There is a long way between me and the best Warlock in Azeroth. One less level stands in it now. Arthas can wait.

A Blood Elf Surveyor made the camp less quiet. I answered with Arcane Torrent, Curse of Agony, and Corruption.

The Surveyor stopped surveying.

Afterward, Steed and I found the Shattered Strand, then returned to the camp. I opened a Dark Portal and stepped through to the Terrace of Light.

A small ride. We did not stand still.

Hellfire began with my old auction things coming home: Dreamfoil, Felcloth, a Runecloth Belt, and the Starfire Sandals of the Owl. I made six Bolt of Runecloth, took the clutter to Fallesh Sunfallow, and let him have it.

Then I found Hulking Helboars for Thiah Redmane’s samples. Curses, corruption, fire, shadow, and a little wand work got me six. I giggled at one of them. It had been that sort of boar.

Thiah Redmane, a Cenarion worker studying Hellfire’s changed creatures, took the blood and gave me an antidote to try. I tested it on Dreadtusk, brought back the result, and kept Big H—my Felguard Haaroon—patched up while we worked.

Thiah’s reward was a Helboar Carving Blade. It was sharp enough.

At the Ruins of Sha’naar, Akoru the Firecaller sent me to find Naladu, another captive Dreghood elder. Naladu needed a key. I found it, brought it back, and used it to free Akoru, Aylaan, and Morod the Windstirrer. The Illidari made a nuisance of themselves. Big H and I kept moving.

A fleeing warrior received a wave and my best mercy: “its all good g. be on your way dawg.”

Morod got a wave too.

I had given Arzeth the Merciless a rude gesture earlier. Later, with the elders free, Naladu gave me what I needed to strip the traitor’s power away.

I laid Curse of Agony and Immolate on him, called on the Fury of the Dreghood Elders, then finished with shadow and soul. I spat on the ground. “You miserable worm.”

Before leaving, I remembered the important part. “Where's my gold Naladu?”

He had it.

Back at Falcon Watch, Apothecary Azethen took the demonic essence I had collected in Sha’naar and gave me the Ring of the Slain Anchorite.

“oooo a nice ring!”

Much better than returned mail. After another visit to Fallesh, I went to Mag’har Post, called the Ancestral Spirit Wolf, greeted it properly, and asked, “Where are you leading me?”

It led me to Gorkan Bloodfist, the Mag’har leader.

The wolf’s trail became a message for the Mag’har. At the Pools of Aggonar, I stopped the cleansing work by bringing down a Draenei Anchorite. I waved to another adventurer along the way.

There was also a Terrorfiend, the Overlook, Northern Rampart, and one bad meeting with a Shattered Hand Guard. I reached Thrallmar eventually. Nazgrel accepted Gorkan’s message and sent me onward with one for Thrall.

After Thornfangs and a short trip through Hellfire, I used the Dark Portal and carried Nazgrel’s word into Grommash Hold. I gave it to Thrall myself and knelt before him.

Then he sent me back to the Mag’har to offer whatever service I could.

So that was where the wolf had been leading me: back again. Big H and I knew the road now.

At the Pools of Aggonar, I put up Demon Armor and answered, “Nice. Thanks!” Then I called Jhaznos, my Voidwalker.

“Ok.”

The terrorfiends kept coming. Jhaznos took the hard part, so I funneled him health when he needed it. By the time we had finished Magister Bloodhawk’s work, I had made soul shards and healthstones besides.

Then we found Arazzius the Cruel, the Legion commander at the Pools.

“Lets kill this red bastard.”

I put Agony, Corruption, and Immolate on him, then hit him with Shadow Bolts. Haaroon, my Felguard, needed some health while we worked. Arazzius killed me anyway.

“Well damn.”

“Guess we need more.”

We found more. I put Rain of Fire down among Arazzius and his defenders, kept the curses on him, and kept Haaroon standing. The red bastard went down the second time. I cheered someone nearby. They had earned it too.

Hellfire Citadel came after: Force-Commander Gorax, then Hand of Kargath, and a great deal of wand work.

“That was fun.”

Back in Thrallmar, I asked for a moment to turn things in. Nazgrel gave me Vengeance of the Illidari for Arazzius, and Magister Bloodhawk rewarded the terrorfiend work.

“Thank you.”

At Cenarion Post, there was work waiting around a huge red crystal at Fallen Sky Ridge. The crystal had stirred up colossi, so I took Tola'thion’s job and headed for the ridge.

“I got it!”

The colossi got curses, fire, and Shadow Bolts. Their shardlings got whatever was left over.

One of the colossi left a Crimson Crystal Shard behind. I picked it up, then finished the work with the other colossi.

“Says to turn it in at the post.”

“We gotta turn it in and come back i think.”

We did. Tola'thion took the shard and gave me Survivalist's Wand for the colossi. Then he sent me to Earthbinder Galandria Nightbreeze with the crystal problem. She had a way to heal the ridge, but it needed doing there.

Back at Fallen Sky Ridge, Goliathon came out to argue. I gave him Agony, Corruption, Immolate, and Shadow Bolts until he stopped. The ridge was revitalized.

“Awww yeeeahhh.”

I said my thanks and goodbye, then waved at the post. Galandria gave me Destroyers' Mantle for the healing.

The red bastard was dead. The crystal had sent us to the post enough times to make the ridge whole.

Hellfire paid me before it killed me. The Runecloth Belt sold for 1g 99s 60c. Barim Spilthoof took two Demonic Capacitors and the Starfire Wristwraps of Shadow Protection.

I summoned my Dreadsteed in Thrallmar.

Then I died.

It was an efficient start.

I brought Haaroon, my Felguard, to the Pools of Aggonar. We worked through Terrorfiends until I had all the felblood Ryathen wanted. Agony. Corruption. Fire. Wand, when it did the job.

I linked Haaroon and me. I made six Major Healthstones and eleven Soul Shards. A Mistress of Doom went down too. Not a bad afternoon for the Pools.

At The Stadium, I found Krun Spinebreaker's body. I cried on the poor thing's shoulder before I finished the business there.

The stone axe in him was strange enough for Nazgrel at the Supply Caravan. Nazgrel sent me to Far Seer Regulkut. I gave the seer a hearty hello. She gave me a totem and sent me back toward Krun's body to call a spirit wolf.

I also fed Haaroon health more than once and made him a Major Soulstone. He was worth the trouble.

A corpse asks better questions than most people.

At the Temple of Telhamat, Magister Aledis finally gave up Viera Sunwhisper's name. I took it back to Magistrix Carinda at Falcon Watch.

Carinda gave me a scroll and a plan involving wine. I had gone looking for a secret. I had found somebody else's revenge. I took the scroll.

Then I found proper Legion work at Invasion Point: Annihilator. Haaroon and I put down a Fel Cannon MKI. Then we went after Warbringer Arix'Amal, the commander there.

I killed him. I took the Burning Legion Gate Key. I shut the gate.

It was not Arthas. Still, it was one less doorway for monsters.

Nazgrel gave me Arazzius the Cruel to deal with next. Magister Bloodhawk wanted Terrorfiends thinned out. So I went back to the Pools.

The Pools bit back.

I opened with Rain of Fire. Haaroon and I went into the Terrorfiends again. I poured health into him until he went down.

“Haaroon! NOOOO!”

I called Gelqua, my Imp. “Okay Gelqua, I choose you!”

We kept fighting. I put Fear on a Blistering Rot.

“And he died..”

I put on Demon Armor. I called the Dreadsteed. I sighed at Gelqua.

Then Blistering Rot killed me too.

I went back to Thrallmar.

The gate was shut. The Pools were not.

I put on Demon Armor at The Sunspire, then took my Dreadsteed through Sunstrider Isle to Falconwing Square. I gave Sheri, a humanoid there, a smile.

Then my head made itself known.

“My head fuckin hurts..”

I handed the Petrified Bark Shield to Sleyin at his counter. Repairs took 70s 10c. The shield and the repairs still left me 2g 99c ahead.

Not every burden needs a demon to carry it.

I spent some time in Silvermoon City breaking things down. Five bits of disenchanting work became 15 Dream Dust and 1 Lesser Eternal Essence.

The dust did not complain about my head.

At The Bazaar, I saw an Orc warlock nearby and gasped. What else was there to do?

Then I put something up for auction and paid 52s 20c to leave it there.

Parnis took the Imbued Plate Leggings, Nightcrawlers, and Shadow Silk for 3g 3s 23c.

Less clutter. More dust. The headache had plenty of room to brood.

“My eyes are up here.” I had to tell Arrowyy before we even left the Undercity. Then we carried Village pamphlets to Southshore and made the lanes unpleasant. Blaedy kept her light on me while Haaroon and I worked; Arrowyy and Friendly kept the guards busy from the other side. Gryphons put my friends down for a moment. I waited. They came back, and we went on.

Rocktusk’s little fire suited us afterward. Haaroon had enjoyed himself immensely. Blaedy made Arrowyy sit close, and we raised our cups. “To murdering the Alliance.” Later, Sheri and I danced beneath the lanterns. Revenge, friendship, free beer. Haaroon, you had a fine evening.

I left Shattrath armored up and rode for Falcon Watch. Magistrix Carinda took Arelion's Journal off my hands. Less scholarship, more somebody else's messy affair. She sent me after Magister Aledis next.

Then I reached level sixty-two. Not bad for a trip that began with bad romance.

The Great Fissure had Stonescythe whelps, alphas, and the usual need for curses, fire, and my wand. Haaroon, my Felguard, did good work. I kept the big guy patched with a Health Funnel when he needed it.

We finished Venn'ren's work and found a battered Cenarion case that needed delivering. I sold the pile of spoils at Falcon Watch, including some leggings. They did not make the cut.

Ranger Captain Venn'ren sent me back with a torch. I lit the western beacon, then the central one, while the whelps made their objections known. I made Healthstones and a Soulstone, and gave a few of them something else to fear.

Then Blacktalon the Savage showed himself. I gasped, glared, and threatened him with the wrath of doom. He killed me anyway.

Rude.

I got him in the end. A stranger was there afterward. “Thank you stranger.” I hugged them, waved goodbye, and then said, “lol.”

I lit the southern beacon before leaving the Fissure. There. All three.

Back at Falcon Watch, Venn'ren paid up for the beacons and Blacktalon's claws. First Flamehandler's Gloves. Then Fine Sash.

I looked at that sash and said exactly what needed saying:

“Now that's a fine ass sash!”

At Cenarion Post, I greeted Thiah Redmane and brought her the case from the Fissure, along with the help she needed. After that, I decided, “I think it's time to upgrade some spells.”

I opened a Dark Portal back to the Magic Quarter, learned Shadow Bolt and Fel Armor, then made Runecloth bolts and belts until I fell asleep. I cheered for someone nearby first.

Level sixty-two. Blacktalon dead. Haaroon still standing.

And a fine ass sash.

I flew from Thrallmar to Spinebreaker Post, then headed back to the Expedition Armory for Emissary Mordiba’s work. I began on the Unyielding there with Haaroon, my Felguard. “Get em Haaroon! ORA ORA ORA!!” A Mysterious Tome turned up in the fighting, and I took up the work of deciphering it. It was Alliance history in a secret cipher; Althen the Historian at Spinebreaker Post could read it. “Disappear from my sight!” I laughed at an Unyielding Knight, told Haaroon a joke, and asked, “Why are there a bunch of Alliance ghosts here anyway?..” I shrugged at Haaroon.

The last Unyielding Sorcerer fell. I pointed at Arch Mage Xintor. “Time to die! Again!” I killed him. The Unyielding Footmen and Knights followed. Back at Spinebreaker Post, Althen took the tome, and Emissary Mordiba received the work from the Armory.

Althen sent me after Lieutenant Commander Thalvos and the Unyielding Battle Horn. The Unyielding were vengeful spirits trapped in their old war, and Thalvos carried the horn they needed. I went back to the Armory and found him. “There's the horn.” I raised my fist at Thalvos, killed him, and brought the horn to Althen. He sent me east to the old Alliance siege tower for Urtrak, the foul orc commander. I went after Urtrak and killed him. I smiled at a Thrallmar grunt and gave him a high five before I brought the victory back to Althen.

Althen sent me back to the Armory’s eastern tower to report Urtrak’s fall to Commander Hogarth. I went there. “AT LAST!” Hogarth took the report, and I received Rod of the Unyielding. I went to Shattrath City, yawned, and fell asleep.

I went to Hellfire Peninsula with Haaroon, my Felguard, and nodded at him before we pushed into Forge Camp: Rage. I brought down a Fel Cannon MKI, but one killed me too. Back in Thrallmar, I said, “This is so much harder without water...” I gave Gelqua, my Imp, a high five before going back out.

At Forge Camp: Rage, I looked down upon a Gan'arg Servant with pity. It killed me, but I finished the servant work. I laughed at Jhaagrym, my Felhunter, and petted him before heading to Forge Camp: Mageddon.

Forge Camp: Mageddon was new ground. I shook my rear there, laughed at Razorsaw, and killed him. “Burn in Hell you ugly motherfucker.” I took his head, then took Vile Plans. The Burning Legion Missive had to go to Magister Bloodhawk in Thrallmar, the blood elf who could transcribe it.

I went back to Thrallmar and brought the missive to Magister Bloodhawk. Then I reported the work at Mageddon to Nazgrel. He gave me Cannons of Rage: the fel cannons at Forge Camp: Rage are aimed at Thrallmar, and I am to destroy them all. I smiled at Haaroon. “Good work Haaroon. Have a cookie.”